Another Report From Irag

Another Report From Irag

© 2003, Roadracing World Publishing, Inc.

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Copyright 2003, Roadracing World Publishing, Inc.

More from an Army Captain we know, who is stationed in Irag and will remain anonymous:

Alright–payday! Well, at least it means half the month of August is over.

Fridays are the best for me ’cause to Arabs Friday is our Sunday–they go to their Mosques or what-nots but they sure don’t work, which is not a departure from their normal habits other than they are not actually here today.

Loose translation–Americans can get their work done. We get caught up on all our ID cards and databasing for the job pickups for next week. We are putting almost 1500 people to work this month. On Wednesday I am meeting with all the big-wig businessmen in town to pitch my office as THE source to find employees. We’ll see how it works since they are sooooo steeped in nepotism.

This week we had Basrah Limon instead of the normal chai. It is a tea made from lemons and oranges, it’s actually really good, but when you aren’t expecting lemons and get a hit you get the Jagermeister face bad. We had a staff breakfast the other day which proved to be fairly interesting. We had grape juice but in their juices they ground their leaves as well–so the grape juice tasted like it had mint in it. Kinda cleared out the sinuses and tasted good, nice combo!

Power of the Note:

Little did I know that notes carry the weight of law around here. What kinda notes? Small ones, big ones, Arabic ones, English ones–but they all have one thing in common, my name on them.

People ask me for notes to see American lawyers, doctors, intelligence guys, get medicine, breathe–just about anything you can imagine they want a note. I mean I got notes popping up in Baghdad saying that I said they could have a job. No, I didn’t, but it makes ’em happy. Now that I have hired a couple thousand guys, who all seem to remember me, my name is getting tacked on to sentences around here like a period. So when anyone asks an American for anything the Americans are sending people to come see me NOW? What the? I got six guys that work for me and 72 Iraqis. I give people jobs, not counsel. Two days ago I had a guy come to me ’cause he had cancer and needs drugs available in America.

Yesterday I had a woman see me ’cause her husband lost his leg in the war and she wants reparations.

Tommorrow I have a woman coming to see me ’cause her and her brother own a tract of land and he harvested it all and sold it and gave her nothing. People, I cannot solve your problems, but if you sign right here I can get you a job next week. People come to see me ’cause they know where weapons are buried, because their car was stolen, but I got one for you:

Got a letter from a man yesterday who had $128,000 American confiscated from his house by U.S. soldiers, his brother got arrested in the process, and what he described as “massive amounts of women’s jewelry” were also confiscated. His claim: He owns a trading business. Yeah, well, why the hell did he have four times the National GDP stuffed in a mattress, a brother on the most-wanted list who is now in a maximum security prison in Baghdad, and enough gold to sink a Spanish galleon? Get outta here, chief–sign the dotted line, get a job!

I deal with all classes, the poor, the rich, the officers who still believe they are privileged (News flash: You lost, no privileges for you!), crazy people, lazy people, and the worst, other Americans who think I can help solve their problems with the Iraqis.

So that is my week in a nutshell. Hope your days are not as fun-filled as mine!



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